When Darkness Seems Too Much

My husband and I recently took an extended trip from Utah to the Bahamas in our personal plane. During the first leg to Texas, we had one hour left. It was 10 pm. The lights of the towns below us twinkled in the pitch black space below us. Suddenly the lights disappeared and, except for the light from the instrument panel inside the cockpit and the couple of lights on the wings, it was PITCH BLACK.

I had never experienced this before. It was uncanny. I looked over at my husband and said, “This is the point where I think I should get nervous. Should I be nervous?”

His reply was calming, yet I wondered how long we were going to have to test the answer:

This is exactly the type of experience I have trained for. This is why I am IFR (instrument flight rules) certified.

I worked really intentionally on my thoughts about what was happening. The trust I place in my husband as a pilot was tested. I consciously observed the panic that wanted to well up inside of me. I heard what it was telling me: you might crash…you might…or maybe…

And then I asked Steve what he was doing to navigate us through the darkness. He showed me how we were flying by instruments only. I knew then that the hours and weeks and months he spent getting this certification were paying off right then. He knew exactly what to do to fly us safely through that dark abyss. He could see what I could not see in that moment.

It took only about 5 minutes…and it seemed like an eternity. The twinkling lights of the towns below us showed up again. We were out of the clouds. The relief was palpable!

I’ve felt this type of relief before. Relief when a difficult, difficult challenge threatened unending darkness and destruction…and the ability to pull through it was amplified…because I had put in the hours and weeks and months and years of personal development to clear out the cobwebs of limiting beliefs about myself, my Higher Power, and the world.

So when the darkness descends upon you, when the clouds envelope you, find your person or people who can guide you through it; people who can see what you cannot see. The darkness need not last forever.

It matters!

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Your emotions don’t need to have power over you.

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I’m Mandy-Marie.

Life is full of challenges–mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. Being able to live from the wisdom gained from our challenges and mistakes is what enables us to become the best versions of ourselves. As a young mother of five, I was a mess of depression and perfectionism. Now as Nana to 5, my mess has become wisdom and propelled me forward with a passion for helping people show up the way they really want to!

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