It is May 30, 2018 and my husband and I just sent the final check for the completion of our backyard creation! I have learned a ton about being a creator in the past several years. When I began the journey to figure out the depression I was deeply rooted in, I had no idea creation would have anything to do with coming out of that chaos.
Unknowingly, I was creating a perfect storm of patterns of belief from my life’s experiences and physical health challenges that I had no idea were going on. That perfect storm was raining down fear and withdrawal and emptiness. Dark clouds of hopelessness encompassed me on a regular basis.
I will forever be grateful for the small desire to create a different reality that began to grow within me around year 10. I decided to harness the storm and reclaim my power which has led me to a life of freedom from depression and anxiety; I am a better parent; I have created a life of abundance; I have learned to turn lemons into lemonade; and my mess has become my message!
All of this came to a culminating point in my experience this morning as we closed the chapter on our home and yard creation of 4 years. The final chapter in this creation began last fall…
I really wanted to have our backyard completed this spring. I figured it would take a few thousand dollars to make it happen. I checked in with my Higher Power to see about the timing. I got the okay and so I put it on my vision board. I included words about my gratitude for the people and resources that would show up to help us finish the project. I also wrote “Awh! Hill completed! Garden Pathways done! Beauty! Ecstatic!” on the pictures of the completed yard. I put all of this in my 2018 story as well. I listened to it, I looked at it, I pondered it, and I paid attention to the next steps I should take.
In February the idea came that I should begin contacting landscapers and get on the schedule. And so I began to make calls. One company told me flat out that it couldn’t be done with the budget I was proposing. But another company stuck with me. They suggested having their architect design a plan and then go from there. We agreed. When the plan came back, my husband and I were stunned! It was absolutely incredible! It was everything and more than I ever imagined!!
The next step was a giant leap of faith as we met with the contractor to get a bid. It was WAY over budget!! We could have stopped there. We could have said, “This doesn’t match up with our plan. Thanks anyway.” I’m pretty persistent though and so we began to whittle the plan down and make adjustments so we could move forward with it.
We reached a compromise after much negotiation…between us and the contractor and me and my husband. We still had to do some real “searching” to make sure we were willing to spend extra money that could have gone towards something else. I’ll never forget the day we needed to make the final decision. My husband and I seemed to be at an impasse…we took a break from it for awhile. And then I had the unmistakable knowledge that it was ok to move forward. Thankfully my husband trusted me with this and we gave the ok to the landscapers.
It only took 3 weeks for the landscapers to work a miracle in our back yard. It was incredible to watch our back hill transform into a creation that surpassed my dreams! My husband and I literally thanked God every day for the miracles of transformation and creation.
What does any of this have to do with depression and reclaiming your power? Everything!! I know beyond a doubt that had I not been persistent in uncovering the physical and emotional roots to the depression I battled, I would not have been in a state to create a beautiful home and yard with my husband. It would not have happened. My life would be so very, very different in every single area had I not decided to reclaim my power and figure the puzzle out.
The choice is yours. Beautifully yours. Reclaim your power. Contact me to support you in this process! Choose to reclaim your power and create a life without anxiety or depression:)