Silence. It can too easily become a way of life. It’s a fairly common theme with those I work with. And it is an enemy.
One of the main contributors to the depression I fought was silence. I formed habits in my youth that contributed to not speaking much. Maybe it was because I was the only girl with 8 brothers behind me. I didn’t ever have a sister to talk heart-to-heart to. I remember talking to my mom and sharing things, but it wasn’t the same. I had a best friend for about four years but that changed as a sophomore in high school. I became a loner. And because of this, I developed a lot of unhealthy beliefs about myself. I observed people. I listened. But I did not do much sharing.
One of the beliefs I adopted was that what I had to say wasn’t very important and that people didn’t really want to listen to me. Therefore, I would listen but I would not talk much about what was really going on inside of me. I took this into my marriage. This is why when I had my first major episode of “falling apart,” Steve was so shocked. He didn’t see it coming. How could he? I wasn’t sharing what was in my heart. I wasn’t expressing my thoughts in depth.
There is a lot more to this personal experience but the overall point is that SILENCE IS THE ENEMY. I am still learning to eradicate the false belief that people don’t want to hear what I have to say. I am still learning to open up to my friends and to my husband and really let him know what is going on in my heart. I can now see more clearly how damaging it has been to be silent, to not express my heart, my fears, my joys, and my inspiration more readily.
So go ahead. Learn from my mistake. TALK! There is at least one person you know who really wants to hear.