Mind Battles

Here is an excerpt from a talk I gave several months ago:

“15 years ago I began to exhibit signs of clinical depression.  I remember wondering what was wrong with me.  I had a great marriage, great children, believed in God, and had everything that I wanted.  Yet I felt sad to say the least.  I felt guilty because I had so many blessings and yet I truly did not feel happy.  I thought that maybe if I just talked to God about it a little more it would go away.  It did not.  About 6 months into these feelings, I told my doctor.  He prescribed an anti-depressant and within hours I felt hope return.  It was as if my regular self emerged once again.  I went about life engaged in raising our young family of five children, supporting my husband, and taking care to nurture myself with good friends and a manicure or massage every so often!  The medication made it so I felt very ‘level’–no highs and no lows.  This lasted for awhile.  And then I began to realize that one of the side effect of of the medication for me was to loose feeling.  I rarely cried or showed much emotion.  Sometimes it even felt like I didn’t have a relationship with my Higher Power.  The struggle became more intense. During this time I daily uttered the words, ‘Please help me have stamina to make it through today.’  And somehow I did.  I did really quite well considering what was happening inside my head and body.  I carried on.  In fact, most people had no idea I was going through what I was going through.  The belief that I should keep everything to myself is something that fueled the depression…”

I invite you to write down a battle that is raging in your mind…what does it feel like, look like, act like?  Now it is no longer just battling inside of you.  It has a voice, it has texture…and it is finally not just in your head!

It can be anything.  Just write.  It matters!

“Somewhere around 2009, my heart began to change.  Up to this point, I had been asking for help to cope with the depression.  As I look back now, I realize I was just enduring.  That was it.  I believed depression was my lot in life and that I would just have to deal with it the best that I could.  I had an experience at our children’s school that caused me to ask a lot of questions about the motives of others–as well as my own motives.  I really began to cry mightily to my Higher Power.  A friend who had worked at the school suggested a book to me.  This began my personal deliverance from depression.  At the time, I had no idea this book and unlocking depression would have anything to do with each other…”

(first published Jan 30, 2015)

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Your emotions don’t need to have power over you.

Does your past and present leave you feeling chaotic, powerless, and believing you’ll never be good enough? I can help. Join me on a free 30-minute call to learn how to unmask the bravery that’s already inside you!

I’m Mandy-Marie.

Life is full of challenges–mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. Being able to live from the wisdom gained from our challenges and mistakes is what enables us to become the best versions of ourselves. As a young mother of five, I was a mess of depression and perfectionism. Now as Nana to 5, my mess has become wisdom and propelled me forward with a passion for helping people show up the way they really want to!

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